Best Friends & Boyfriends

A relationship has enough of a roller coaster ride to manage without the added baggage of forging a healthy relationship between your boyfriend and your best friend. Don't you think?

Well, to start there's always the matter of who came first. Who is more important. Who is feeling slighted. Who is a little jealous. Or perhaps it could be that you and your best friend have extremely similar tastes and you are wondering if she likes him a little more than she should. Does she find him attractive. Does he find her attractive. Are they both passionate about something that you aren't? Like music or Stephen King novels?

Best friends and boyfriends...I mean it's almost worst than your family not liking him, because you spend a majority of your time and energy connecting with your best friend. So if she doesn't like him or likes him too much - then what? But no one dumps their boyfriends over their best friends do they? Not really. Over mom and dad. Maybe sisters and brothers. Definitely children. But never the best friend. She just doesn't rank high enough. Yet, if there is a problem between her and your boyfriend--it's a catastrophe!

Suggestions? Well, it's pretty safe to say that you should treat your best friend just like you would any other family member when it comes to information. If you tell her everything about your boyfriend -- then it can come back to you at a later date and when you least suspect it to. She will remember everything bad you ever said about him, and when you have that big fight with him she will be there to remind you of all that you did tell her. And you will resent her for it -- when really it's your fault.

If you tell your parents or your co-workers or other people only select things about your boyfriend - they you should do the same with your best friend. It is never too late to learn discretion a.k.a. keeping your business to yourself! Much success!

-GirlShrink

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